The Drop of a Hat, Ogden Nash.

The Drop of a Hat.
by Ogden Nash.

Darling, what is that?
That, angel is a hat.
Are you positive? Are you certain?
Are you sure it’s not a curtain?
Shall you really place your head in it?
How’s for keeping cake or bread in it?
Do now wear it on you head;
Find some other use instead.
Say a cloth for drying dishes,
Or a net for catching fishes,
Or a veil by night to veto
The bill of the mosquito?
Darling, what is that?
Are you sure it is a hat?
And if so, what was the matter
With the hatter?
Was he troubled? Was he ill?
Was he laughing fit to kill?
Oh, what was on his mind
As he designed?
Had he gone without his supper?
Was he dressing in an upper?
Did he plot a wily plan
To annoy his fellow man?
Is its aspect, rear and frontal,
Intended to disgruntle,
Or was it accidental,
And is he now repental?
Are memoirs of the brim
Now agony to him?
Do visions of the crown
Drag his spirit down?
Oh, may the Furies batter
That eleven-fingered hatter!
May doom and gloom enswaddle
The creator of this model.
I hope he made a lot of them,
That dozens he has got of them;
I hope he has a harem,
And all his spouses warem.